"When polygamy came about at the House of Yahweh it was the best thing since sliced bread," explains Hawkins.
Now nearly 18 years after her excommunication, Kay Hawkins is letting people know the truth behind what seemed like such a stroke of genius to some at the time.
She adds, "It takes a while for fruit to develop and a generation is enough time to let you know that the fruit produced by polygamy and slavery has come to it's... stench."
Partly because of polygamist practices and partly due to wild rumors surrounding exactly what goes on at the House of Yahweh compound, the organization, or "cult" as some believe, has captured the eye of Big Country residents for decades.
But how much of the rumors and wild speculations are based in fact? According to Hawkins a surprising 90%.
"Where there is smoke there is fire," she explains. "If anything is spoken about it, they try to squash it, but it's still true."
Some people may ask how someone could be drawn in to such a controversial organization, but as Hawkins explains the conversion doesn't happen overnight.
"There are certain people looking for certain things," she explains, "and the first writings of the House of Yahweh were very religion oriented.... At first they fall in love."
This initial infatuation with the scriptural teachings doesn't necessarily create the passionate member right away. Hawkins says it takes a few meetings before a potential new member gains enough interest to consider officially joining the organization.
"It takes quite a while to get there," adds Hawkins, "but once they are there it's hard to leave."
Hard to leave and not what was promised or initially advertised during the inquiry period.
"They don't tell you in the writings, oh by the way when you get here it's entirely different from what you've read," says Hawkins.
In her new "tell all" account of life at the compound, Hawkins reveals that while there were times of "sorrow" there were also times of great joy. It was in those times Hawkins met many people she still maintains relationships with to this day.
"There's a website, it's a private website, called 'Remember the Love'" Kay describes.
The website is a place for other former House of Yahweh members to gather and keep in touch. According to Hawkin's the website has close to 280 members.
The book "The House of Yahweh: My Side of the Story" is available at Hastings and online at Amazon.com
Read The Book For Yourself:
"The House of Yahweh
My Side of the Story"
by Kay Hawkins
Available at Hastings and